In reading our Proverbs study, I was asked to think about some questions and give some feedback. I had to chew on the questions for a little while because I didn’t want to just blurt out some answers without really thinking first about the impact that my answers might have.
One of the questions I was asked was that if I am a more analytical person and have a natural tendency to “problem solve” throughout the day, what keeps my self evaluation and commitment to grown manageable? I would like to say that I am an analytical person and problem solver throughout my day but only when I am at work, where I am forced to problem solve. My brain is often mush at home. I don’t really think too much about problem solving because I’m doing the mundane tasks of life, cooking, cleaning, and laundry. However, it’s during those mundane times that I like to listen to my Praise & Worship music. It reminds me that even while performing the boring stuff in life, we can have joy in our hearts. I don’t’ think about that at work because I can’t listen to my music; so there is a time and place for mundane and problem solving.
Another question that was proposed to me was, in what areas have I noticed I fall short on? Oh my, I could write a whole list. There are days that I don’t even know if I have enough paper for all of my daily whines that I blurt out, especially since I have been sick. I would love to stop the whining and praise HIM more for the simple joys of my day. I would have to say
that I am good at getting up and spending time in His word and praying, but there is always, always, always room for improvement in that area as well.
I was reminded that we need to make our goals manageable, focusing on the few things we’d like to do differently, and then, we need to make sure that we create concrete steps to initiate change. I agree. I am such a visual person. I have lists everywhere. I have the old fashioned kind of calendar that I can erase, cross off, write and re-write things. I don’t do well with the virtual calendar. I have to touch the pages. So, I know that if I need to make a change, it is not going to work for me to use any kind of technological support, NOPE!!! I will use my “post-it” notes and my good ole spiral calendar. That’s what works for me.
I think as Christians we can be so hard on ourselves. If we would only remember that Jesus died for us, took all of that shame, guilt and pain to the cross so that we would not have to carry it around every day. I do think that there is a level of accountability that we have to have, but we also sometimes just have to fall before the cross and let it all out there and leave it there. I think recognizing that we are not the author of our lives but rather that God is and His Spirit is the one who reveals where to make changes and how to make those changes is the first step. It’s a day to day walk. If I make goals and fall short of them, I try really hard not to beat myself up any more. I’ve wasted so much time in my life allowing myself to be beat down by the enemy. I just pick myself back up, brush myself off and begin another day living towards victory.